You're a grown man and you have your own life to conduct. All we can do here is give you advice from our heart and wisdom based on what we read here. There is always a much fuller story to anything that is written here. You can't always explain love just as you can't always explain miracles. The risks here are outrageous, so we can only give you logical advice. Love isn't always logical or healthy, but it is what it is.
I hope this goes the way you really want it to, I hope it is all genuine, and I hope you heal and grow from this experience, no matter what the ultimate outcome.
Always on your side. (Even though I doll out plenty of unsolicited motherly tough love.)
Lucky
I couldn't state this any better, John. For the record, I think she's full of it, and I think she's nowhere NEAR "bottom" and ready to have any REAL epiphany, but I'll try to support you either way.
For now, I think your stance needs to be "Give nothing . . . expect nothing." Do NOT unilaterally disarm. Think of today as a detente meeting, with all of your arsenal still at your disposal should you need it.
