I'm ready to wake up now...........

[Silent Chrleader]

Update.....

This was H's e-mail reply last night to my telling him I wanted to go up to the dream house every weekend I could......

A short while ago you had indicated that I needed to give you notice in advance of my intended visits to "the main house" which would allow you to consider your decisions on whether or not you could support this and where you might adjust you plans. Let us apply that same criteria to "the dream house". There is no peace of mind when we are both there at the same time. My offer to share is a gracious one, please leave it as a sharing opportunity. Your proposal of “most every week” is imposing. I feel it is appropriate, albeit not limitless, to keep this arrangement as arranged weekends. I pay both mortgages, and I am fixing both homes, I get first choice. ............

I did not reply to this e-mail. It's true I asked for notice on when he comes to the house because I live here and did not want to be around. The dream house is a different situation. It's not like I am just showing up unannounced where he lives. It belongs to both of us and is our weekend place.

I won't go into detail, but I don't appreciate his contention that he is being "gracious" in the things he is doing on the house(s). He has always acted as if the dream house is "his" and anything he does for us is because he's such an upstanding guy and we should be grateful. Let's just say I disagree with this stance.

Anyway, I figured that I didn't want to push this any further at this point, so I did not reply.

Didn't have a great day. Very weepy and depressed, but then had a good session with C. S18 was supposed to have a session too but missed the ferry "his ride standing him up last minute". When I got home, D24 says S18 is on his way over to talk. I am exhausted and want to go to bed, and C said I did well at setting the boundary with him and need to stay firm, but listen to what he has to say.

So, I just checked my e-mail and got this from H.....

I sent you a card for mothers day that was sent back to me by mistake in the change of address flow. I put it back in the mail and you can see the cancel date initially was 5-4-09. Sorry it didn’t get to you.

I am floored. He has given nothing like that since the bomb. I really wasn't sure how/if to respond. Sandycay thought it didn't require a reply. But, I know this type of stuff is a tough thing for him, so I went ahead and replied a simple "Thank you so much for the thought, and I will keep an eye out for it."

S18 just walked in the door........he is sopping wet from having walked from "friends" house here in the rain (that's a long walk).....