John, I was posting as you were posting and missed your posts...good on the lawyer, I would not tell your wife anything tonight, you do not have any proof, slow down, this is not a sprint but a marathon. What is a few more days going to change? It is much better for you to develop your plan. You can always change it later...talk to the lawyer. No, I do not think you are desperate, I think you are mad. You must collect your evidence...you know alot so take the time to get what you need. If you have to hire a PI then do it...if you can get an idea of her routine and when they meet it will not cost as much as the PI having to follow her....
Please, for the sake of you and your daughter...slow down, go see the lawyer, you are in the drivers seat with her leaving and setting up another house without her daughter. Don't screw it up.
If you can get her to talk about this via email you can use it...very few courts will let you use voice recordings. It also gives you time to think about your reply
There is no rush...if the OM is going TDY this week (if he is leaving in the morning they might have plans for tonight? friend/PI? to investigate (not you) it will force your wife to spend the time alone...you make plans to do something with your daughter that do not include your wife.
