Above all, your D needs every bit of you to be "okay." The underlying stuff that makes you think that there is no one else out there or that makes you desperate for her to come back is not healthy.
You need to GAL now. Be around people who make you laugh. Just be around people and get out of your head.
PMA is right: You are special because of all that you've done for your family and for your country. Please see that and have faith that life will ultimately take care of you if you stop trying to control it.
