T2SP, my son is so afraid to say anything to his dad. It is so sad, he will say, "its ok dad, never mind", he is so afraid his dad will get mad at him and not talk to him anymore. When I was calling my xh all the time in the beginning, my son stayed stressed out alot in fear of his dad taking things out on him. His dad was his HERO. This makes me so angry at xh, he has no idea how much his son loves him and cares about him.
It is sad the way your h is acting also. He is putting that woman before his children and one day he will pay for this. Its pitiful how they will do anything to please the ow. Sickening.
Give your son time to adjust to everything. My girls were the same way. (they are 15 and 18 years old) In the beginning I was the one who had to listen to them complain and tell me how they felt (which was ok). I tried telling them to open up to their dad but they wouldn't. Same as your son, fear of their father getting mad at them. It took them a couple of years to finally stand up for themselves. Right now, they don't care if he gets mad or not. They just tell him like it is. I am proud of them for doing this.
My oldest told her father that he could do better than his girlfriend. I about fell on the floor when she told me this. I found it amusing.
All we can do is be there for our children. As they grow up and get married and have their own families, they will understand all we have gone thru to try and save them from the heartache. We will be the ones they respect. One day our exes will realize all they have lost. By then though, we will have moved on fully and be living wonderful lives.
We will be the ones who come out on top in the end.
