Welcome! I was in a very similar situation for over 8 years. My H and I have just recently made some major breakthroughs in our situation. It has taken quite a bit of work with regard to reading, posting here, and some difficult but necessary communication between me and H.
How much have you discussed with your H? If you have had discussions, what does he have to say? Has he read SSM?
I look forward to getting to know you better and to offering any help I can. This is a very good place for support!
Hang in there. This is no easy road, but it is such an important one.
