Boy I thought I was in the clear and I just got whacked. My w. called me up and told me that she was concerned about the idea of the kids spending to weekday nights a week sleeping at my house. Says it will be disruptive to their schedule. Says it is unfair to them and why don't I just visit them over her house and have them every other weekend. I told her I thought that was wrong and that I am their father and not willing to be a peripheral part of their lives. She launches into "you weren't their father for years (remember I have a d4 and a s2), so I don't understand why you need to be one now." I said it was unfair of her to question my motivations and me as a father. She says "well I have these residual feelings of anger toward you. That's a situation we both created and it is what it is." I told her it was unacceptable and if she was changing our agreement then everything was off the table. She said, "your threats don't scare me." I told her I was not threatening her. (I have told her I will give her what she asked for in child support, alimony, and offered additional money to help out. All I want is to be a part of my kids lives). Now I am wondering if I should go for joint custody. There is part of me that is starting to feel like she is really unbalanced. She is re-writing history and my actions to make me out to be something that I never was. It's like she has this alternate past that has nothing to do with what happened.
What is scary is this -- I am no longer concerned with saving my marriage. Whatever she has become is not the woman I loved and married. I am scared to death of how we are going to raise kids together. Could she really be having a psychotic breakdown? Or is this just guilt over realizing that this is going tob e painful to the kids forcing her to re-write history to justify her actions? In other words do I have a short-term problem, or do I have a full-blown 'we can't co-parent' problem?
Please help. I don't know what to do and I am scared.
