The adventure continues--the saga

[AFWAW]

I have thought about this. This is what scares me the most--the anger and hatred that my wife will have towards me. I don't think it will ruin her career and I really don't care about his. At the most, she will get some paperwork and maybe not get promoted ever again--so be it. The way she is talking and the way she is acting make me feel like there is no shot of this working in its current state. While it is a long shot, the only chance I will have is if the affair is over. I don't see another way to end it. Do you? According to my wife, she "loves" him and doesn't want to choose. Hell, for that matter, she doesn't care if he cheats on her--she still loves him. I never got that deal--and no, I wouldn't want it either. So you see there's something not quite right about her thinking at this point and I believe that while this may be partially vindicitive, I also want the affair to end for two reasons. The first one being vindicitive in that I want her to suffer as I have w/ a broken heart and two, hopefully it will wake her up. Hell, I still love her. If she called tonight and said I'm an idiot and I'll never do it again--I would probably take her back. At this point though, I think I have more chance of winning the lotto and I don't play.

Keep in mind that I want accountability. I am in no capacity to dole out punishment. This will be just as hard for me to see through. If I stayed quiet she would walk all over me till she decides to file for divorce. And you may be correct in that the no contact order may drive them even closer. But think about this, for military members, when given a no-contact order, if violated, they can face charges under a court-martial if pursued. If that isn't enough to wake my wife and OM up, I don't know what is. As far as waiting for it's natural death, I don't believe I have the time and/or patience or desire for that matter to wait. Why would I?

There is a cycle that needs to be full before the WAS can get over the affair and unless it's time for it's "natural death" , dont count on her waking up and running back to you with remorse.

I honestly don't think this will ever happen and I think my time for wanting this is about at an end.