I Never Imagined Being Here

[Making_IT]

It does sadden me that our 15 yr relationship is ending like this. We have both invested a lot time, effort, sweat and love into it.

I can honestly say that since I have come to this conclusion, I have felt night and day better. The anxiety levels are no where near what they were. I am focusing much better on work and life in general. It feels like the right decision.


I initiated a meeting with her on Saturday afternoon and she was resistant at first. I told her that it is important that we speak in person and she agreed. I could hear the fear in her voice.

The meeting went well in my eyes. I felt strong, confident and knew what I wanted to convey. I explained to her that I have moved forward with my life and that I intend to keep doing that. I explained that I had to proceed with the mindset that what we had was gone and that I didn't feel that we could re-build things after everything that has happened. I told her that children is something that I want out of my future.

She was very sincere and receptive throughout the meeting. This is one of the few times that she has been this way since the bomb. She was very upset throughout much of the conversation which made me feel bad for telling her these things.

I did hear a couple of surprising things. One being that she said that she has never came to the decision that we were done. She was still undecided. Another thing was that she felt there hasn't been enough time as its only been two months and not the six months of her lease. I told her that it has felt like a lifetime and there is no way I could ever risk going that low again or living in fear that it could happen.

She acknowledged my stance on the situation. We discussed splitting up the remainder of the assets and what would be the best way to do that. So far all seems to be going smoothly and we both want to try to get lawyers involved as little as possible. I will likely get things rolling in the coming weeks to finalize.

I will continue to update this post as things progress as it may be useful for someone else going through a similar situation.