I Never Imagined Being Here

[Making_IT]

Man, you all are great. I truly appreciate all of the support that you have provided through this event. I don't know how I would have made it without a support group like you have provided.

There have been some developments and I want to share them with you. Primarily the developments have been more on my end, but they certainly affect the marriage.

I have been getting out with friends and family a lot and truly enjoying spending time with each of them. Each day I felt stronger and stronger. It is kind of hard to describe, but I have been very comfortable with myself and the changes that I have made.

I have done a lot of looking within and thinking about what I want out of life. One thing in particular is that I want children before I get too much older. This wasn't a deal breaker in the marriage, but since everything has happened I have put much more thought into it. My wife has confirmed that she doesn't have a desire for children and likely never will.

Honestly, the separation knocked me to the ground completely. I feel like everything that made me the person that I am was turned against me to make me feel and look like a bad person. I feel like the majority of the anger towards her is gone and I am truly working on forgiveness. With that being said, this is not something that I feel I could ever forget.

I decided last week that I want to proceed with the divorce.