Setting Boundaries for MLC Alien H

[In Limbo]

Well, the great support I got on the board this weekend helped me to stop before I spoke too soon and took any action I would regret. I'm still reflecting on how to handle sitch with OW's H, but decided not to mention anything about boundaries to H and successfully avoided all R and OW talk all weekend (go me!) The weekend went really smoothly and IMO we did not have any disagreements and only one little bit tense moment. This morning I even got a chance to validate (I think). He mentioned something about how I was always negative (speaking about a situation in the past) and I said "Yes, you're right, I was way too negative and uptight. I can see how that was really hard to live with and I'm sorry. It's something I am working on now." No reaction really from him other than a little bit skeptical look, but no sarcastic comment and he didn't throw an example of recent negativity back at me, so I took that as positive.

I'm traveling 3 days this week, so he will just stay at the house this week. As much as I dreaded him coming home this weekend, I'm ok with him being here after this weekend going so smoothly. When he left this morning he asked if I wanted to meet up at the Y to exercise together. I guess it's a good sign that he wants to do something with me when he could just go by himself or go out instead? Baby steps?

Lovingly detached...so hard. I feel like every time I make a bit of progress (or at least fool myself into thinking I have?)...he comes home and we have some "good" days and I'm back holding on. But I will continue to let him initiate contact and give him his space.