Friday, I took daughter to a concert series and kept her overnight.
Saturday, her and daughter made cupcakes for a dance picnic. She texted me a picture of my daughter cooking them. Very nice.
Went over to borrow the lawn mower (we agreed to use one until move, foolish to buy a second when we may move in two months and not even need the one we have). wanted to get in and out without seeing her. Getting it no problem, dropping it back off they were home and saw me. Played with daughter a little, wife asked me to set up sprinklers. I agreed to show her how to do it. Then they gave me a cupcake. Then she asked me if I could fix a lamp she couldn't fix herself Very pleasant visit but still?
I mean the only way to say no in my mind is to be a dork. So what the heck.
I was thinking about what Robx, Puppy, Gucci and others say while mowing, She acts like I am there if she ever snaps to and says lets give it another try. She says stuff that implys that. And I wonder why is that? But like they say,,, because it's true or at least she thinks it.
Funny though... I am becoming comfortable with her not being in my life. So I am mowing and thinking so what.. there were things she did that I didn't like but she doesn't see her doing anything wrong. Whole marriage collasp was my fault. I made a lot of mistakes but not all my fault. Now I am just pissed at her because she gets to live this fantasy out where there are no lifes problems or kids around. That's BS! And I don't like her for that!
I feel pretty good as long as I don't see her. The physical attraction is overwhelming when I am around her. And when we talk I still feel that comfortable feeling. I really use to like being around her. We were very compatable and was like being with a best friend.
i have to keep telling myself there are other women out there that will have the same qualities but not be so self indulging?
Then tonight we talked on the phone because we are trying to manage some of daughters homework (end of year) projects and it is all nice, friendly and fun.
Best thing about that convo was she talked about how much fun her and daughter had doing things together. How daughter kept telling her how much she loved her. That really made me happy! Maybe she is coming out of her selfish funk a little and can make room for my daughter! I really hope so.
I did ditch her first on the phone. Said I had to get going.
Very pleasant visit but still?