The adventure continues--the saga

[AFWAW]

Ok, D just got home. Wife came in for a bit and got some more of her stuff. She asked me if I was going to be mad for long. I said, I'm not mad and I'm not. I'm just not interested at this point. I think she got that as she told my D goodbye but did not seek me out to tell me anything--good, I'm not going to be there for her that way anymore unless she's going to recommit to our marriage which is laughable at this point to me. D reported to me everything to include the wife telling her that she has a boyfriend. She also said that if Daddy and I get things worked out I may come home--yeah, right! She told D about all the stuff she talked about w/ me before about how I didn't treat her right. She left out all the ways she didn't treat me right either--whatever. Now she's justifying her actions to my D. My D said she's no longer afraid of her mom which is good. She told me that she gave wife her Mother's day card to which her response was thank you, but I'm not a very good mom. (D said she agreed although she didn't voice it) I just listened. D also told me that she thought she knew his name as she saw it on a computer game that she was playing on the wife's computer(yes, she told me). So now, when I get my info from my friend I will have 2 sources.

Hoop, if you're out there, how can I do this with the least amount of collateral damage? Should I just go to my CC and tell him that I have reason to believe that my wife is having an inappropriate relationship w/ an officer or do I introduce proof? I would love to be able to expose so that the wife does not know or cannot prove that it was me that did so. Any thoughts?