John, I'm on the run out the door, so just this for now:
The crux of what I meant by "blowback" is that there MAY come a point where your feelings toward her -- and your marriage -- change. If they do, then there will be much more work to do because of the additional layer of aggressive exposure that you will have done. More healing to do.
I still think it's the right thing to do, and can be DONE right, but that's something for which you need to account, even if you don't at ALL feel like that's a possibility right now.
