Having just erased my original answer, it occurs to me that this is in fact rather a sinister question. The men around here, like you, are the LBS; presumably, if we knew the "trick" for getting your H to come back, we'd know the trick for getting our WAWs to do the same.
As to the notion that there's a generic set of things that "men/women" always "want" -- women want a Man, preferably with hairy ears and back, a club, and clothes made from a wildcat's hide (and, if possible, who is named "Alley Oop") -- I find myself in the minority here. In the original version of Woody Allen's play, "Play It Again, Sam," the Woody Allen character has a discussion with his girlfriend over the then-widely accepted idea (c.1970) that all women secretly wanted to be raped. Okay, that looks pretty horrifying from 2009 -- so this currently trendy idea that one should Man Up to win fair lady's favors may go as stinky as last week's gallon of milk before too long.
All that being said, I think the suggestions you've received so far pretty much cover what you can do -- you can only do what you can do about you. Among other things (you may have noticed) men have pretty easily bruised feelings and can be pretty stubborn. You absolutely should apologize as The Wifey points out, simply because it's the right thing to do.
Don't leave him books, because he's not going to read them, because as the WAS he doesn't have a problem -- you obviously have the problem (in the WAS worldview) otherwise he wouldn't have walked-away!
Don't look for justice or a fair accounting of past injuries done. My WAW, for example, never fails to point out that I wasn't "there" for her when her mother died, and never fails to put it in "all I wanted was and he failed" terms -- yet she somehow ALWAYS manages to neglect to mention the fact that I'd only been back from a 15-month tour in Iraq for 6 weeks. So maybe, you know, theoretically, that could have had something to do with my emotional detachment. But I can't expect WAW to tell the story "fairly," because her job isn't making me look good -- it's making HER look good.
And don't be surprised that "his" people and gf listen sympathetically and nod their heads and agree with him -- we generally don't tell our stories to people who won't validate them, and validating is really, at the end of the day, a kind of bullsh*t. We want approval, not analysis.
This, incidentally, is the best thing about the DB online community -- you get legitimate validation (your feelings are okay) AND legitimate criticism.
So listen to the Coach and The Wifey and turn your focus inwards. At the end of the day, you is all you can do.
