Had to start a new thread because I couldn't find my last one. It's been awhile since I wrote in it.
Update: Haven't had any hang up calls. I've had my answering machine take all of the calls first anyway. It's been a little over a year now since I've recommitted to my marriage. I still worry about seeing OM while out. But, I don't dwell on thoughts about him any more. H and I are still working on the intimacy building. Slowly, there is progress in that area. We are definitely moving in the right direction. H is being more assertive about his feelings. He isn't sweeping them under the rug like he normally does, and that is good. My son is doing really good. Happy. Life is good.
TOnight, we've invited my egf and her fiance (the one she had the affair with on her second husband) over for a cookout. She DID enable me, and she did give me horrible advice, but she was the only one there during that whole time. I don't feel like I cannot NOT be her friend in some capacity. However, she IS that friend that "sucks the life out of me" emotionally because she has lots of issues and problems. She also makes me feel bad about myself. Or, I should say, I let her make me feel bad about myself. This will be the one time I invite her over. Then, I will let her initiate. I don't think she will because she never plans anything. She just likes things to happen at the last minute when they work out for her. So, I expect she will move soon, and be out of my life more or less. Probably a good thing.
Those friends you have when having an affair.....in some ways I know I need to let her go, but yet it doesn't seem like the right thing to do. I'm going to stay friends, but keep more of a distance. I hope that is the right thing to do. She does need help, and sometimes I feel like I am the only one that can help her. But, maybe she just needs to start helping herself.
