PM Thread #5 - Hope new plan works

[Can it work]

PM,

Congratulations on the meeting. It sounds as though you did brilliantly. Well done! From your post it didn't even sound as though you were too conflicted during the session and that you'd definitely gone past the acting 'as if' stage. That shows real strength of character and conviction. Kudos to you!

I'm trying to put myself in your H's place right now and must admit I'm finding it difficult. The fact he noticed and commented on how good you looked just goes to show that he's beginning to lose some of the WAS traits. When he says things like that you can bet that he means them. I'm going to go out on a limb here and make a bit of an assumption. As a guy, the way you describe your H's actions sounds very much like he now feels trapped with OW. I don't know what kind of R they have but I've got a feeling she is controlling his actions to a certain extent. In doing this she is obviously your main hurdle. I'm sure you know this already though. Your H will be feeling a fear of going back. Stubborness makes us stand by our decisions even when we know they're wrong. I would have cautioned you against DBing too well and making him believe that you were now lost to him but you've already covered that eventuality by telling the C at the session that you are still willing to reconcile. You also managed to let him know that you're not willing to wait forever though by mentioning the possibility of moving back home and getting remarried. That must have knocked him back a bit?

Anyway, I fully believe now that your H won't need too much encouragement to come back to you if only he could find a way to get shot of OW. You really are an inspiration to us all PM. Thank you and good luck!

Keep smiling - you've earned it!

Kev X