K, To further clarify IMO some of these "pop psych" books are "garbage" because: (1) they are not based on proven scientific facts (2) they are so imbalanced that they do nothing to heal the relationship (3) they are invariable not read by the spouse who really should be reading them. IMO it really makes much more sense to focus on books and things that YOU need to be doing not what your spouse needs to be doing. For example there's a book "Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr Laura Schlessinger - this is garbage if a man wants to get his W to change - she will simply throw the book at him.
