WAW1 - Anticipation

[markhaving probs]

J,

I hope you had a good day. On reflection it sounded false and too structured. Next time I will 'Mark' it better but remembering the DB fundamentals.

I agree, there was no way she was going to respond but I am going to be who I am, and if she doesn't react...no problem as long as it is not false. I hope to talk to you tomorrow.

GFI2,

On your "too much, too late", that was uttered 3 months ago to a mutual family friend, but I did expect that from her as it was radical changes I was doing. the normal things, helping around the house, being more helpful towards my wife and the children etc. Also, the change was new at the time and would have been treated with contempt, I have to remember patience and continued and consistent actions speak louder than words.

I do have to be a bit careful here as I wrote a letter to each of my children thanking them for the lovely weekend we had together. I also wrote down I love them both and am very proud of them both. My wife understandably had to read my son's letter to him, she said to my son and daughter it was "over the top". I thought it was unfair of her to utter this within their earshot, they do not need to know what she is thinking as my daughter told me she was pleased to receive a letter and had written a response.

I am happy to be spending quality time with my children and it is strange my wife treats my efforts with scepticism, though I presume it is because I have been neglectful in this area and feels I am going overboard with my actions now.

As far as strategies are concerned I will continue to check the childrens schedule and see if I can offer my services...but under my conditions so that I using my 'anticipation list' rather than being reactive or waiting for my wife to suggest times when I can pickup/drop off the children. I will also think ahead to events/activities we can do when I have the children so that if I am asked I will have an answer ready. Of course I will run any activity I have planned by the children first.

This really is hard work to try and keep the changes going, but I guess this is why they call it a Labour of Love.