Your W cannot possibly show any melting towards you...likely she's been on this WAW walk for a while and along the way constructed all sorts of "truths" in her head - "he can't change, he won't change, he'll never change... "
Whatever you are doing right now can and will be seen as "too much and too late"...but thats where your new found skills as a man and as daddy come in...it may be too late - which you accept...but hey - this is who you are are now...Mark - make these changes stick - you might not win this battle, but you might win the war...
In Jeremy Paxman terms I'll give you a starter for 10:-
Mark, you have some strategies -tell us how you're deploying them proactively:-