d-day coming soon - help !

[misshim]

My H and I married when we were both overweight. (in 2003) I lost 80 lbs in 2006 (he never once gave me a compliment) his friends and family always did that had always hurt me really bad that he couldn't ever say,"good job", "looking good" anything would have been nice. My will power wasn't very good and of course my weakness came back for food when he'd tell me how good his ice cream was at night, and I was drinking water or on tread mill. I gained 40 back, my own fault. Well in his depression or MLC (i'm not sure, maybe both) he used to eat alot !!! When he left at the end of November until first of January he went from 48 to 40 waist. He really looked bad,(physically) pasty gray color to his face. (I suspected drugs? cuz of the girl he was with.) But now when he comes over he's always wanting to bring supper over or asks me to take steaks out of the freezer (we have a small beef farm) - he grilled out last saturday night, he even went to grocery store for soda & other stuff (he never went to the store since our marriage). He doesn't live with d-4 and me but last night he was over. He texted me that morning, out of the blue. He said "Why is it that I miss D-4 so much when I'm not with her but when I am with her she is too intense?" I said, "You miss her because you love her and she loves you, it's the little things you do with her that mean the most" He said, "yeah, I guess your right! can I come and see her tonight?" I of course said sure, I hurried home from work, got d-4 from daycare and fed our farm animals and hurried to get ready for him to come over. He was so nice to me and we small talked about his work. But he doesn't ask me any questions ever.
D-4 he helped put to bed. He came out of d-4 bedroom and asked if I would have some ice cream with him if he ran to the store. (i didn't really want any, I've been losing alittle weight again and I want to keep going) But of course I said sure that would be great. Well my goodness he came back w/ice cream, chocolate m&m's and 12 pack of Pepsi and 12 pack of Dt. Pepsi. A month or so back he wouldn't hardly eat anything, now it's almost like he feels very comfortable. During our marriage he never told me when things were hurting him (or I didn't hear him) but now he is always giving me a list of his ailments. I don't mind hearing about it I guess but I don't know how to respond. I usually say I'm sorry to hear that your knee,shoulder,neck,ankle, (whatever the ailment is for the day) is hurting, let me know if I can help. He says yea help me by just shooting me. (as he laughs) ** don't get offended we used to shoot alot of soda cans on the fence in the summer when we were bored *** But I told him I could never do that to you, we would miss you too much. He said no you wouldn't, you'd be better off without me. Oh my !!!!!! I feel like he's in a self pity, poor me phase, - I want to be there for him so bad but I know this is his fight. Will "we" ever get turned around to enjoy our life again???? I guess that will be answered by the Lord. The Lord has given me so much stength through this, and by my faith in the Lord, I know that he hears my prayers. I guess in the end he will decide if my marriage survives or he believes we should seperate. I pray to the Lord all the time and I really was comfortable in telling the Lord, I might have lost my Husband but thank you I've gained the Father.

Have a great day everyone !!! Please give me lots of advice