Game Over?

[dday101798]

Hopefully that is enough history. I of course did all the things a LBS shouldn't do, beg, plea, cry, etc. Did that up to and through our 10th anniversary, then started doing things better.

As said, there were times where it 'seemed' as though she wanted to work on things, however, NEVER and til this day has seen the fact she lives with OM as a problem.

Most recently, Monday night when I called to talk to our boys, she answered. She thanked me and was very flattered by an offer I made to go see a band we both like tonight for Mother's day. She said although she'd love to, it wouldn't be right, but we do need to talk more to be more friendly with each other so can we can do things like that and "who knows". That she still misses me and wants to hang out with me.

I am of the postion, we are in final stage of a D she intiated. Sure I did it wrong most of the time, but I remained willing to work for a long painful time. I had set the deadline of 2/1 to move out of the house, of wich I had told her, if I do, that is pretty well it for me (call it a LRT). But anyway, what could possibly be the harm in trying to be friends now and maybe do something together?

I finally detached myself from the situation almost entirely in about March. My life now is my time with our kids when I have them, and helping my older cousin out whom I now live with.

Back to the call on Monday night. All was calm and peaceful for about 10 minutes before she exploded into another one of her tirades to crusify me solely for the R & M problems. Why? It's almost over. We just seem to simply not be able to have a sane conversation. I've let all that go, which I think enfuriates her more. It does seem like each step we take through court makes things a little less tense, but none the less, the end result is always the same.

So, that's it for now, been meaning to post here for while, just hoped D was not the answer.

BTW, never once have I heard the ILYBINILY, and she ahs freely said, she does still love me, I would love to say that is all part of the game, but when we do make eye contact I know she's still there, somewhere.