It goes back to fear, I guess. If I can stop being afraid of what might happen if....and just live my life the way I know is best for me and the boys at this crazy juncture, then things would probably be better.
EXACTLY!!!
Quote:
If I can stop being afraid of what might happen if....
Oh it is hard to do...but look, the LBS is the one that is in control of the situation. You don't believe me right now...that fine. You stick this out and you will. Its not really about control or power...but you have it. Any time you want to quit and its over, the relationship might get better because you aren't giving up, you're still married because you decided to be married. Your choice to do what many find themselves unable to. Your chocie to be a doormat...for a little while.
Physical contact is your choice. For some it works for some it doesn't...I will say this Limbo and I am sorry for it. Get used to the idea of an physical affair. Most of them have one, and really...nothing you do or don't do will prevent or stop it. It is not about you, you cannot fix anything this is one of those sucks lessons about that...you cannot fix it, you cannot stop it.
Acting as if...doesn't mean wearing a plastic obviously false smile around.
Him asking what is wrong...you can be honest, and unload and get into an R talk and push him away.
OR
You can be honest and say simply. "I'm just trying to come to terms with this, it will take a little while."
Honest doesn't mean floodgate honesty.
For the record.
"What's wrong?" "Nothing"
That reply is the foundation to most relationships ending. You stop talking and that just leads to a bunch of other things stopping as well. : )
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
