How are you today? I took time and read through your entire thread to get caught up. Since you've been so great to give me your support I wanted to give you mine. So two things I wanted to tell you:
1. Congrats on your H being back home. I know the fear that goes along with it. I don't know if you recall but this is the 3rd time my H and I have been S. First he left in '05 for like 6 weeks, then I moved in '06 and he followed in about 3 wks after. He didn't move in with me until about 2-3 months afer. And then now. I was always uneasy with all of his returns because I never felt like him and OW were over. Since they share a son he would try to break contact for a few days and then they would be back in communication. OW had even gotten married and so I felt like ok they are just co-parenting. But nope. It just got messier. And him and OW seem to get back together or to just end up sleeping together. So... 2. You need to listen to the others guys here and get your H to do no contact. He doesn't have lasting ties with OW so he should be able to do it completely if he wants the M. Piecing is difficult but now after my experience I know it is extremely difficult to near impossible if our spouses are still in contact with OW. My H has ping ponged so much that this time around he will need to prove to me that he has ended it with OW for us to move forward. Without that I think I will live with the fear an anxiety of his ping ponging again. For example, like your incident when he was shopping for your store and your thought it was OW, you will have many of those if you don't know for sure OW is gone bye bye. One day H and I were working at our place and he got a call. I hear a woman's voice and I got pissed off. While he was still on the call, he yelled at me for acting that way. And I got even more mad that he would speak to me in such a manner in front of OW. Guess what, it was his sister on the phone. I reacted that way because H was still in contact with OW. If she was out of the picture I would not have had such a reaction and one less argument. I don't mean to rain on your parade, but you will have many more of these instances without the no contact in place and some level of comfort that it is over with him and ow. Maybe find ways to set up boundaries with H being home to let him know that ow needs to be gone completely. I know how badly you want it to work and it will with ow gone.
BTW, I laughed when I read about OW calling you and hanging up. My H's OW was great at doing that ampng many other crazy things.
