Hey 6-understand that DB are general techniques used to sometimes awaken a wayward spouse. But in the long run-DBing is about you becoming a better person.
Right now-your wife says you are not attractive to her. She may or may not change her mind. How do you feel about yourself? Are the changes to you that you would like to make? Right now your self esteem is probably at an all-time low. The woman you thought you would spend the rest of your life with has hit you with some pretty hard stuff. Start building your self esteem back your way. Make sure you feel good about yourself. Do things that you have put off. Get some new clothes, haircut, workout, new cologne. Whatever it takes for you to have self confidence. If you are confident, she will see it.
As far as ILYs-be true to yourself. The term thrown around here is to lovingly detach. You have to be careful though because your wife hasn't full detached from you. Personally, I think a few well-timed ILYs can't hurt. But you can't overdo it. She has to feel at one point like she is losing you if she will ever come back. Otherwise she will continue to dance. There are some sary similarities here to my sitch, especially early on. If you get a chance-read up. I got some great advice-but didn't always take it.
Strength and Honor.
M 43 W 44 M 17 T 22 S16,12,9 Bomb 2/05/08 I served her 1/06/09 S'd 3/15/09 D'd 12/21/09
"Tough times don't last, tough people do." --My Dad to me years ago, me to my boys now.
