Irish,
My point was that HE needs to realize that you do notice and do care. He needs to get over needing your approval.
Nothing you have done is "wrong".
That is what I mean by ME needing to detach... I Not needed recognition for EVERYTHING...I think your H is like I have been and trying to overcome.. Being insecure. Being happy for myself..

Here is an example of my thinking...
This Saturday is a car show in the next town (no cars before 1970)A friend wanted me to bring my Mustang. Up until Yesterday I was thinking "since it has been raining and it is supposed to be nice this weekend I have things to do around the house so I can't go"
Later last night I started thinking.. I never just do nothing. I never do things I might enjoy "just because" (detaching) ....So I decided I am going to go to the car show.. Let the "house hold chores sit for a weekend....

And if I claim to be a wise man, well
It surely means that I don't know