The wife just called and cancelled. Just as well. I didn't ask for an explanation but she offered one anyway.
Not bad.
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She said she was chatting online w/ a girlfriend--ok whatever. I said, ok no big, talk to you later.
Good. Stay happy. No big deal on your end. Perfect with the "talk to you later" and wanting to get off the phone.
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She says wait, can I come over tomorrow? I said, I don't what time? She said aren't you off tommorrow? I said I am.She said would it be ok if I come over at 6. I paused for a sec and said ok sure but give me a call around 5 to see if I'm here, ok? She said ok.
Very good on asking her to give you a confirmation call to make sure YOU are there.
All in all, not too bad. You put no pressure on her which was excellent. It is OKAY to talk to them when they call. Just stay happy and polite and then politely end the call. "Talk to you later is an excellent way to end a call first.
You now have it set up in your favor today to go in whatever direction YOU want it to go....
Your options are.
Wait and see if she calls at 5:00. If she cancels again, then you use the same routine that you did today.
If she wants to come over and you want her to come over, then let her come over and just be a happy, confident, self assured man. (NOT happy that she is with you, but just in your own little world happy)
If she doesn't call.. DO NOT CALL HER. Make plans to be busy as the clock strikes 5:00. Do NOT wait one second after 5:00 to head out and pursue your other plans. Don't even check your email or answering machine when you get back. (this is what confident and successful men do)
OR.. When she calls at 5:00, tell her you were "just" going to call her and that you can't be there tonight and will have to make it another night. (same thing she did to you) Tell her that something like "I am going to (fill in the blank)go out with "Jim" (or whoever) and play some pool and watch the basketball game. Then politely get off the phone. Don't TRY to sound like you are trying to make her jealous. Just matter of fact. Make sure you already have these plans in place. Do NOT cancel your plans for her.
Remember... YOU feel the SAME way. Maybe it won't work. Maybe this time apart is for the best. (only if she brings up a talk probing for reassurance).... "I guess I know how you feel now too"......."Let's just take it one day at a time"
Her: "Do you still love me"?
AFWAW: Well, I will ALWAYS love you, but so much has happened between us, that right now I am not sure if I am IN love with you. I need to sort through my feelings. Well, I really have to go. Talk to you later."
That is the routine...
You CAN talk to her. (when SHE contacts you) Always be happy. (not acting happy that she is giving you crumbs, but just happy as if you are really busy and have other things on your mind now and have lost your obsession for her) Be nice. Be polite. Get off the phone first. Never any pressure. Stay the same distance from her that she is to you. (this keeps the pressure off and for allows them to PURSUE YOU)
Cheer up. This isn't over. We need to get you back in the correct position here. Tonight was a start. You CAN NOT backslide on this. Hold the line.
