It's been a rough couple of weeks. Kind of ironic in a way. Life has a way of sending you subtle "hints" when your heading in the wrong direction. Sometimes when those "hints" are ignored, life smacks you in the head.
I'm where I need to be today. Focused on my children. Working on myself. Taking things slow, one day at a time. I'm not ready to move on. Forward? Yes, there is no standing still. Moving on? No. There is more work to be done.
I've done an awful lot of thinking this past week. Thinking about everything that has happened these past two years and of ways to keep improving.
I haven't had any contact with my ex except for a couple of short emails. She was asking about the mortgage and when I was going to pay her the equity she will get. (which isn't much at all) She said she needs to "plan her budget." Hmmmm.
I'm sure she will be in touch regarding taking the kids on mother's day, but nothing yet.
Things have become a bit more difficult for me now. I'm not going to whine or complain, this was all my fault. The only option I have is to hunker down and keep pushing through. I know one way or another everything will turn out better in the long run and I'll be better for it too.
Regardless of what has happened Mother's day is for her...deserved or not, however...and the suck part is it might not be reutrned on Father's days...in the right here and right now.
However, Mother's Day is also for your children. Teach them to Honor the Day...teach them not for your wife, but their mother, teach them so that they teach their children in keeping a tradition for deserving role models worthy of the name.
You are better already, you are a good guy, keep it up, and some woman is going to be glad to have you in their life, and who knows WHO that woman will be with the door left a little open for some time.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Hey, sorry it's been a rough time for you. You are moving forward, and that's all you can do. Keep on keeping on. You know, in life, if we couldn't feel the pain we couldn't feel the joy either. It just seems like the pain lasts for a long time sometimes.
Jack- chicks dig scars- lol
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
I can't just slam the door and never look back. Not after all that has happened. She is lost and there have been way too many things that point to a crisis. This isn't her.
That doesn't mean I will be waiting or watching for her to come back to earth. "Who the hell knows" (Jimbo) if that will or won't take place. I do know what it is to love and commit to someone and that is not something that can be turned off like a switch.
This rough time can be viewed as a blessing or a curse. I CHOOSE to view it as a blessing. I will become better, that is also a choice.....a no brainer, but still a choice.
I in return know how you feel, I also just cannot shut the door, at least not yet.My ex is also very lost, and I feel for her.Right now I can pray for her, everyday.
m-54 w-44 children-4 bomb-sept 21 2007 t-21 m-20yrs bomb-sept 23 2007 divorced but not giving up hope, not yethttp://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...rue#post1224023
I second that sentiment Craig. Its hard loving a spouse that is lost, and you are unable to help...except by loving from a distance.
M44 H46 T21 Married 16y D14 D12 Bomb 12/08(EA), (PA/Separation)1/09 to 5/09 Home/MC 5/09 to 12/09 Leaves 12/09 Files for Divorce Divorce final 6/30/10.
