alien invasion II

[BeingMe]

I don't know if I did my best;

You did your best under the circumstances you faced. Don't downplay the effort you put into saving your M and your family. As for blame --- we all are guilty of a portion of a failed M. Some of us, however, prefer to turn to an outside source for comfort and that turns into an A. Your XH did that and he was WRONG! And, he is completely to blame for that. (Not sure about the circumstances of your first M, so can't comment, but just because you are a common denominator, doesn't mean you are all to blame ---- I repeat, your XH turned outside the M and that trumps all, in my book.)

It's hardly worth your while reflecting too much on what you could or couldn't do. Don't be too hard on yourself ---- be gentle to HM. She's been through hell and survived. Give yourself a chance to just be. After all, you have that job to look for, your daughter to take care of, so just take it easy and give yourself a break.

I also think you should write that letter, even if it's not sent. But, wait awhile ... give yourself a month or so to breath free air.

Just my thoughts. Take care.