Setting Boundaries for MLC Alien H

[In Limbo]

KJ,
I have been good about talking with family and have only told 2 friends, chosen very carefully, and I only talk with them maybe once a week. Reading, journaling and venting here have been my salvation.

I'm really angry right now. I had planned to go to a meeting tonight (part of my GAL work) and Friday H had suggested we meet, swap off the boys and he would keep them while I went, then I would get them back and take them home. We discussed it last night and he acted put out (remember HE suggested it). I told him not to sweat it, I could make other arrangements and he said no, he just wanted to make sure I understood I HAD to get them by 8:15 because he had to get to his class on time. I was cheerful and said sure, no problem. So tonight I drove all the way over to where we were to meet and we waited and waited. The time for my meeting came and went. I called him (didn't know what else to do) and he didn't answer the phone. I left a chipper message that maybe I misunderstood, blah, blah, blah. When he never showed, the boys didn't understand and were worried. How do I know if it's just the MLC irresponsiblity or if something's happened to him? Guess I just wait and see if I hear from him. I'll be darned if I'm calling again.

As for the OW, I do know what she looks like (gorgeous, young, skinny of course). I even met her a while back (before EA). It's hard because when we're around folks he used to work with (she worked for him at his old job), they mention her and have no idea what's going on. H is a very private person, so I wonder how he'll feel if/when it comes out.

I'm struggling with GAL because many days I just don't feel like doing anything. Everything feels faked. We moved here about a year ago and I haven't done a good job of making friends and we have no family nearby. I just feel so isolated. I know I need to reach out and change that, I just find it hard to have casual conversation when your thoughts are consumed by this roller coaster and nobody knows. We haven't even told our kids for goodness sake. They just think Daddy's "traveling." Detach, detach, breathe, breathe, detach, detach....scream!!!!!!!