Have you ever spoken to a pyschiatrist/pyschotherapist about this? I would strongly advise you to, I think it would really help in your understanding of Dan, if you want to tackle this issue with him. Me and my sister both have. I think it may alter your perspective and remove any guilt and shame from yourself (as other posters picked up on that and yuo said yourself you felt yuo had colluded with Dan and not bought this issue into the light).
I still think its about acceptance. This is likely who Dan is and what makes him tick sexually. He might not be 'fixable'. He is unlikely to react well, no as Sandycay says, but you should confront it yes and set your boundary on it.. after so many years I would say its about time.
Good luck with your convo with him xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
