Kalni I agree. Sex is fun! And I enjoy having sex with my husband! I did it with him before we were married but I knew I wanted to marry him. My faith (Christianity) encourages sex in marriage. There is a whole section of the Bible, "Song of Solomon" I think it is called. All about sex between spouses. So I am okay with upstairs downstairs, all around, whatever! And he has always said to me and to counselors that he has no complaints about sex, that is one area where we always had fun together. I never believed my mother except that I wouldn't 'sleep around' as some people do...I think sex is great.
It was just certain times with certain sexual approaches where you could tell by his eyes, at least to me, I had stopped being the woman he loved and become some sort of 'project'. I don't know if that makes sense...He was looking at me but not seeing me at those times and that is when I would tell him I didn't want to do whatever it was we were doing. But in general I don't think we have ever been sex-starved. 2 weeks was a long time for us, we almost never went that long except when the kids were born.
And Ali I don't know how to explain it to you. I am NOT talking about shaming him. I am talking about telling him "I know this about you, I know this is a struggle you have, but if you continue on with it you are going to destroy yourself and our marriage/family. I am here, I love you, I DO/HAVE/WILL support you if you want my help." Then if he doesn't, I will rebuild my life without him as my husband.
