(((Ali))) thanks for posting. You brought up some interesting points. The FB incident and my reaction to it just goes to show me that I cope much better with ow when I don't see or hear any evidence of her so for my own personal mental health I try to keep away as much as possible from anything that might lead me to hear about her - not that there is much opportunity for that anyway.
I should think he doesn't mention any of the stuff with me to her. What ow would put up with their boyfriend being so friendly to their wife that they aren't even divorced from or showing signs of initiating divorce.
For me DBing has made a huge difference because I was putting a lot of pressure on before. 180's have allowed me to see real changes that I needed to make in my attitudes and I can start to live them for real. Also, it has opened my mind. Before DBing I was convinced I was right about everything - youth I think and my H would say 'you aren't always right', I think he felt he was fighting a brick wall, as was I. DBing has allowed us to mesh a bit and that is growing, slowly admittedly, but I do feel progress.
(((Kassie))) I'm so pleased you are back. I was worried about you and hoping all was well.
(((Mishka)) You put a big smile on my face this morning Happy Tuesday!!!!
Just an update, I haven't heard from H. I am staying dark just for the moment and waiting for him to contact me. We had a lot of intense (for us) interaction last week and I want to keep the pressure off him from me by not going all eager because he let his guard down a bit. Still, when you have had interaction it makes you want more and makes me struggle with patience.
I must say that I do find weekend and especially bank holidays the hardest times which is the exact polar opposite to life pre-bomb. I used to live for my weekends and holidays. I do struggle with loneliness, I saw friends and stuff over the weekend but I do miss that intimate connection. It is partly life circumstances, living in an area where I know no one and being quite cut off even from even local shops and also working in a one person (me!!) organisation. When I move I am really going to work on meeting new people. When I am more mobile and less cut off by my transport situation things will be much better I hope.
Two things I am going to work on to improve my life... I have a great big huge idea for work that if I can get off the ground will be fantastic and renew my interest in my job again. The second is that I am also going to learn to plan better. Next bank holiday is at the end of May and is also near my wedding anniversary so I am going to make sure I am so busy that I will not have a moment to think about anything!
and my H would say 'you aren't always right', I think he felt he was fighting a brick wall, as was I. DBing has allowed us to mesh a bit and that is growing, slowly admittedly, but I do feel progress.
