My Sailor is Back-but not Home

[StrgMarvelousWmn]

Now, normally I would not be condoning that forceful of a conversation, however, looking at the impact afterwards, there does not seem to be any repercussions. The reason I am not for all that, is because of the guilt you place upon his head. I know that you want him to stop hurting the kids, and I know that Bob came home only for the kids first, and then God restored his and Barbara's M, but I believe that your H needs to come home for you. as well as my H. I do not believe that we need to guilt our spouses into coming home.. not that it was your intention. I know you were trying to get him to see the hurt that his choices are causing them to go through. This is why he kept looking at the ground, and then saying he had to go, and saying he couldn't go to the meeting with pastor. It is too great for him to deal with. He is weak right now.

Now, I'm not totally against your convo...(just part of it), and I totally understand, and you did well keeping calm and all that. NOW, don't do it again.

Sorry I disagree with this. SMW did not put her H on a guilt trip. She presented him the facts as to what is going on with their children as a result of the actions he is taking. If he feels guilty about that, then he should start doing positive things to fix it. To me, not telling him what his children are experiencing as a result of his actions does him a disservice in having any chance of salvaging a decent relationship with his kids. To me she is doing the responsible thing, if her H thinks she's simply putting a guilt trip on him then it's a further reflection of his current selfish attitude that has infected his relationship with SMW and their kids. Just my 2 cents.

S4H

What S4H said. ^ Damnstraight.

Puppy

Thanks for your support, too, Puppy. Any thoughts on the time he is spending and planning to spend here? I was thinking of letting it go on for a couple weeks to a month and then tell him that if he is going to be here all the time, he can move back home, with the right conditions in place.

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW