Now, normally I would not be condoning that forceful of a conversation, however, looking at the impact afterwards, there does not seem to be any repercussions. The reason I am not for all that, is because of the guilt you place upon his head. I know that you want him to stop hurting the kids, and I know that Bob came home only for the kids first, and then God restored his and Barbara's M, but I believe that your H needs to come home for you. as well as my H. I do not believe that we need to guilt our spouses into coming home.. not that it was your intention. I know you were trying to get him to see the hurt that his choices are causing them to go through. This is why he kept looking at the ground, and then saying he had to go, and saying he couldn't go to the meeting with pastor. It is too great for him to deal with. He is weak right now.
Now, I'm not totally against your convo...(just part of it), and I totally understand, and you did well keeping calm and all that. NOW, don't do it again.
Sorry I disagree with this. SMW did not put her H on a guilt trip. She presented him the facts as to what is going on with their children as a result of the actions he is taking. If he feels guilty about that, then he should start doing positive things to fix it. To me, not telling him what his children are experiencing as a result of his actions does him a disservice in having any chance of salvaging a decent relationship with his kids. To me she is doing the responsible thing, if her H thinks she's simply putting a guilt trip on him then it's a further reflection of his current selfish attitude that has infected his relationship with SMW and their kids. Just my 2 cents.
S4H
S4H--
Thank you for the support. I think Crissy is worried that it reality will push him further away. I don't know. For now, he seems to be pullin in. a phone all Thursday night, emails on Saturday, D6's birthday party resulted in him being here all day on Sunday, he was here all evening last night and plans to be over tonight. He has duty tomorrow and is planning to attend D9's counseling appointment on Thursday. Friday is family game night at the church and he is planning to go to that, too. That is an awful lot of time here for a man that does not want this marriage or family. I will just keep shining. Friday will be good for that, as my closest friend is on the committee for the game night and I will get to goof with her and her twin in front of DH. He will see me interacting with others outside of our family, with people he has never met.
I am doing good.
Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~ SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
