JJ, My relationship started out amazing. My husband has always been my best friend. I think things started to change after some some stressful life events (birth of our daughter, death of my brother, and breakup of my parents marriage), that caused me to lose focus on the relationship and take him for granted. Because of my own pain and stress, I failed to notice his, and worse, I believed him when he said everything was fine. I few months ago, he dropped the bomb that he has actually been unhappy for some time and didnt know if he could stay married to me. I was blindsided to say the least, but now understand how it happened and the things I needed to do to improve myself. The problem is, nothing I do seems to make any diffence. We are getting along much better due to DB techniques that I have been using, but it feels like he made up his mind that he doesn't know who I am anymore.... Our C sessions are not really productive frankly.....I mean, it gets us talking about issues, but doesn't seem to resolve things. I am wondering if I should start going by myself (husband already has his own C). I think I may have caused him to have MLC, which has meant some really good changes in his life except for the fact that he is no longer in love with me! I adore this man, and will do anything to save our family....we are both rather young (I'm 28, he's 33) and we have overcome so many obstacles....I won't give up now! For the most part, we do not discuss R, unless he brings it up, and after a few weeks of desperate begging and falling apart, I finaly found Michelle's book (thank God!) and it was like she had been in the room with us! I immediatly started using LR....My H has not read the book (I've had that backfire with other books)but see the principles of it making our day to day life much more pleasant....but I want the passion. I want a husband, not a roommate. Which is ironic becuase I know I made him feel like the roommate for a long time. Patience has never been something I was good at, but I am having to learn.... I just dont know if "pleasant" is really better, or how we will ever move beyond that if he is so closed to having any physical connection (he doesnt even initiate hugs)? Any advice from you guys just might save my sanity!
