We went to dinner tonight by ourselves (I kind of had to bug him to go). During conversations, I was mentioning some places that I would really like to visit again, places we had been together, and he very abruptly changed the subject.
If he is the type of man that hardly ever wants to leave the house to go out to eat, then it makes it hard on you, the wife. However, men hate it when we ask more than one time or mention anything more than once. They call that nagging! Don't you just hate it? But, truth be told, men are not attracted to women who have to "bug" them to go somewhere or talk about subjects that are "off limits" (to the man, anyway). So, mark it down that that evening was a learning experience for you and not to repeat it. I understand how hard it is not to act like a married woman b/c you ARE that, but try to keep telling yourself when you are with your man not to act like the old stero picture people have of a "wife". If he doesn't want to take you out to eat, then in a light and uplifted way, just say, "Oh that is alright, I will go without you." You don't have to say anything about going along or finding somebody else.......but he will wonder about it since you are acting upbeat. I hope I am not giving out the wrong impression. I know what it is that I am wanting to relay to you, but I sure don't want you to misunderstand the message. Anyway, that could have been an opportunity to be "mysterious". You may have had to go to the mall and walk around or call a girlfriend to go with you to eat, but he didn't have to have all those details. No, it would not have been what you wanted in your heart, but as it turned out, you were pretty down at the results of the evening, anyway.
Men will always be interested in the woman that seems just out of his reach. Which seems a bit odd thinking about a wife in that picture b/c women want anything but to be "out of reach" where their H's are concerned. But it is the nature of the male. So, in our own female ways, we have to continue to be interesting, exciting, intriging, and mysterious.....so the H will continue to want to know what is going on in our mind and our life. For me, it is easier to be more mysterious when I can be somewhat........sassy about it. It keeps it fun and he can't really get angry about it. It also stirs up his curiousity.
I just believe it your H can start to see you in that light that his focus will be completely on you and nobody else. Keep him off guard, so to speak, so he will never know exactly what to expect when he comes home. At least it won't be boring for him.....lol. Talk about 180's.....
Take care, and come post as often as you can.
Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
