Mark, WAS are going to do what they are going to do. Let it go. She has decided to take the journey the easy way, i.e. escapism, rather than do the work of rebuilding a M now. Be patient, you will need A LOT of patience. Just like watching your child play, you have to let them fall before they can get back up. You can't prevent them from falling. You just can't.
So glad you didn't ask about her life. She is going to see it as pursuing and you sticking your nose into her business which is a big turnoff right now. No need to try to work out the inner workings of her mind, you will drive yourself crazy! OK?
Work on you.
As yourself, what will make me a better person? What will give me great happiness? Is it making a difference in my community (volunteer work, try it, it really works!) Or is it making myself look healthy again (improving looks always gives an instant lift of self-esteem). Or is it doing something great for the people I love? (I know it sounds corny but people love getting letters in this age of electronic everything). How about sitting down and writing gratitude letters to your family members? E.g. Mom and Dad. All too often, we leave until the last minute to say what is in our hearts (e.g. on death bed etc) and we waste all of our lives pretending we don't care but in actuality too embarassed to show our vulnerable sides.
Write gratitude letters to your family, maybe even your children. Kids LOVE getting notes! Start now. Who knows, maybe you will get one back yourself.
But I would NOT write one to your W now, bad timing.
Me:39 H:40 S:9 D:7 First Bomb ONS:June 07 Second Bomb OW: March 08 Separated: March 08 M:15 yrs T:18 yrs H deep into A with OW Achieved ACCEPTANCE May 30, 09
