The adventure continues--part 5

[AFWAW]

Great if she comes back (if affair is over, if they are still "buds" and talking/working out it is not over), regardless of the reason, at least that way you will always know you tried your best for yourself and your daughter.

I think it's over for now--call it a feeling, the way she's talking now, the way she's acting, I don't know. The fact that she wants my D every weekend. She may still be in contact w/ OM, I don't know.

What was so bad in your opinion and your W about your marriage before Iraq? Everyone has low points...anyone so naive to think that marriage is not work has not been married for very long. The military makes it more difulcult at times due to long duty hours and deployments but the deployment is not the root cause...many more make it and become stronger because of the seperation...grateful for what we have thought.

From my standpoint about me(since I can only fix me), I didn't cherish my wife the way I should have. I took her for granted(big mistake), didn't pay attention to her, got annoyed at her very easily. Additionally, I didn't take care of me which made it easier not to take care of her. I recognize this now--I ate too much, drank too much, watched too much tv all of which made me a fatass 205lbs(I'm at 175 lbs now) who had no motivation and/or energy to love me wife the way she needed to be loved.

We used to go to church on a regular basis at our last duty station. For some reason here, we have had difficulty finding a church that meets our needs.

Bottom line, right now, I feel like my wife is wrestling with the idea of coming home and I don't blame her for thinking that I would revert to the old me. She wants to be cherished and treated like a woman. I want to do these things so badly now that I ache. I really hope and pray that I get this opportunity.

Do not get caught up in the revenge mode...it will eat you up inside and again, PT, self improvement, no alcohol.

I won't and I think exposure right now would be a very unwise decision since she in right on the fence and hopefully wobbling my way.

She did tell me she loved me today. I really hope that she loves me enough to come home and work on us.