Stress, WAW and life in general III

[AJM]

Ah prom. Must have been fun.
Song, AK, MB, thanks for checking in.

Journal Update:
Brother in law is coming out to show his support. Bastard. Complicates things quite a bit, but there you have it.
W is scared. She was scared to tell the kids. Melted down a bit the day before. I've gone the other direction though and I am helping her to move out. I even offered to move the furniture or help pack. Instead, she's getting a mover and taking only a few things. She's scared. She should be.

She's not ready to give up on the marriage yet. That's interesting. She mentions that she sometimes has so much resentment well up inside her towards me. She also mentioned that she is still angry at God although she's working that out more and more I think. I think this is more because of two things: her inability to deal with anger (her mother wasn't much of a model for her) and her pursuit of her career. I don't think the marriage is over. But it certainly presents some major challenges.

Since telling her I needed somebody that could really listen that I could really share with and feel safe, she's made some changes and been a better listener. I think may be out of fear, but I may just not trust her yet. I suspect when she starts back to school on Monday, that she'll revert. We'll see.

Some neighbors are separating this weekend. Over money (control). It is interesting how W is saying that she just can't believe that. It's horrible. Same for another friend of hers who is divorced and is darn happy about it (best thing she did). While others that we know are miserable because of it. She's pulling away from more of the dysfunctional running buddies and heading for different friends. She's spending a lot of time with the kids. Quality time. The sep agreement has her spending lots of quality time with them. I'm happy about that part.

I think she's confused as to why I haven't given up. She keeps saying that she thinks that the MC is important and has helped her a lot.

The kids took the news surprisingly well. I was a bit pensive afterwards (after comforting daughter and wife - trying to be her friend and trusted go-to guy vs. just her lover.) She came over and gave me a kiss and asked if I was alright. Told her I would be fine in a few minutes.

We went for a walk as a family. We then went strawberry picking and came home for dinner and watching the hockey game. W wanted to talk a bit after that and then she went off to bed.

That's about it for now.

AJ