Thanks for making me feel better. I'm so big on always doing the right thing that I try so hard at this DBing thing, and then beat myself up when I do something that's not along the LRT. I do call H at times and so does he, and I know though in my sitch I was the R fixer and always pushing things so I need to back off. But I know I haven't been successful at letting my H know what's accceptable or not, but I do wonder sometimes if going dim is better than dark, keep some level of communication open. Dunno.
