Actually the advice is all the same when you look at it. Everyone's just saying to tell him what your needs and expectations are very specifically, make sure he understands, then let him run with them on his own by trusting him.
to this, I would add " -- and verify," but yeah, what Stuck said. ^
Pearl, you've got to chill, or you're going to smother him and scare him off. You're stressing ME out, and I'm not even your BF. Just go with the flow right now, let the transparency plan be your safety net, and enjoy yourself. You deserve it.
But since you are so kind to check up on me, here's an update.
Still seeing xBF almost every day. Not sure if that's too much too soon or good to reconnect.
Fri we had lunch since I was going to be near his office. He was surprised because I usually go with my friend M (his coworker) and I paid for my own lunch.
Sat we went to Dave & Busters for dinner and skeeball. It was a fun evening, we haven't done that since last fall.
Today we did yard work. Not really together since he was in the front yard and I was in the back. He didn't get mad when I accidentally cut the extension cord with the hedge trimmer, whoops! We ordered Chinese food for dinner and cleaned up just as the rain started.
He was heading out when I asked if we were going to have a real talk since it's been almost a week. We discussed how to start dealing with things. He thinks we can talk it out on our own, I think we need a third party to guide us through it. We agreed to meet Thurs night and try to start. If it doesn't go well we'll go to a MC.
Then he invited me over to see his apartment. So I got the grand tour of the bachelor pad. Turns out I visited that apt complex when we were looking for apts when we first moved to town. He gave me a remote to the gate and garage so I can come over whenever I want. That was nice but I don't see spending much time there considering he has an empty living room and nothing in the fridge but beer, Coke and a bottle of Ranch dressing! His lease is for six months so that means it'll be up in August.
Nothing earth shattering, just swimming along.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
That is a big step.... be happy! Ranch and beer... sounds like all that's missing is the wings!
Good luck on the talk.
M:47 M:18 D16, S19 1st S 1/08-5/08 Reconciled/May 7, 2008 Left again Nov 9, 2009 I Filed: Nov 17, 2009 Final: April 14, 2010 EX walked away from kids too
My wife use to joke " a couple that can wall paper together can live together.... but cutting through the cord on the hedge trimmer
Just joking.... glad you are doing well.
On further evaluation I would have had to ask what the ranch dressing was for? I mean in the game "which one doesn't belong"...... But it's better not to ask the tough questions LOL!
all joking aside ... glad things are going well and hope you're happy!!!
The ranch is an easy answer...it is his favorite food. Yes, in his world it is a food. Other things are merely vehicles for the ranch: vegetables, french fries, pizza, etc.
And I am pretty handy since we've done a bunch of remodeling projects over the years. I can change out light fixtures, plumbing fixtures, outlets, install laminate flooring, tiling, painting, removing wallpaper, etc. Hey, I just changed out my tires the day before! So everyone is allowed the occasional mistake. And once I buy a new plug I will fix the extension cord.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
And I am pretty handy since we've done a bunch of remodeling projects over the years. I can change out light fixtures, plumbing fixtures, outlets, install laminate flooring, tiling, painting, removing wallpaper, etc. Hey, I just changed out my tires the day before! So everyone is allowed the occasional mistake.
wow...talk about breaking the mold.... I know a lot of male friend who can't do that much
Originally Posted By: pearlharbr
And once I buy a new plug I will fix the extension cord.
oh yeah and I was joking here... things happen... maybe one day I'll tell you the story about how I caught the floor of my garage on fire while lighting the barbeque grill LOL!
The ranch is an easy answer...it is his favorite food. Yes, in his world it is a food. Other things are merely vehicles for the ranch: vegetables, french fries, pizza, etc.
LOL! That's funny! So his fridge looks perfectly normal then!