I've been doing a lot of thinking about this thread over the weekend. Also, about your comment that if you had listened to the advice that some of the posters gave you on how to act when your H was home for a visit (not to mention what your own gut was telling you to do) that you would surely be divorced.
I think that too many of us ARE expecting a hollywood ending. You know, where the WAS realizes how in love he/she really is and swoops in and reclaims his/her spouse in some bold, romantic gesture. Well, upon further thought, even in the success stories here, I recall no such occurence.
So, many of us sabotage our own successes because they are not big enough, bold enough, obvious enough. You can surely see how many times I have done it myself.
I know not every marriage will be saved, but I have to wonder how many more could if we were better at detachment WITH love and forgiveness. Those seem to be the sticking points for a lot of people. Detachment works for them only when they are so pissed off that they see no other option.
I think I'm rambling a bit.
You've given me lots to think about. I appreciate it.
