Can anyone answer this? Part 6

[kjensen]

Renee,
Just a few thoughts reading your last post. Your exH pursued you. You weren't interested at first. Later you "hung on to him with everything in me."
Here's my thought. It might help you the most in the short and the long run to be the best partner you can be to YOURSELF. If you can mentally get to a place where you don't NEED a man in your life, but want a man in your life, you will be in a stronger position to have a lasting relationship. Most of the time when there is a partner who clings, there is a partner who withdraws.

In some of your posts you come across as a lost child asking for directions from everyone. The next post you are angry. It is totally understandable that you are feeling all kinds of emotions ranging from fear, anger, pining, loss, denial, loneliness...etc. These are uncomfortable emotions for a lot of people. No one wants to feel those feelings, but they will go away. Time, growth, effort all will help.

But what I think a lot of people here are trying to tell you is find someone to talk to to help you find your calm, adult center. Distract yourself. Write in a journal, paint/draw, work in the yard. Do something that requires physical effort. Find some way to vent that doesn't directly impact your family or your exH. Get those emotions out, feel them, deal with them and own them. Find your calm center and things will fall into place however they are meant to. You can miss and still love and even still want your exH in your life, but ignore him for now-it won't hurt your situation and it most likely will help. Focus on you and dealing with those powerful feelings and emotions. Right now it seems as if your emotions are running you and your life. Find a way to own those feelings, so the feelings don't own you.

Becoming comfortable in your own skin, with your own voice, and most importantly revolving your life around YOU will allow you to become a strong, centered woman. Only you can find YOUR path to that place.
I wish you only the best. You can do this!!