Hi Walkingback.. I dont know, I dont know if I will ever know the answer to that. Maybe it will come out in time. I do know he didnt have an A and nothing happened with her until August 08 (10 months after he left me) and I saw an email on his PC Oct 07, when he was out in the garden, 2 weeks before he left me, from her and it was purely formal and not even like they were friends. BUT, as me and J said, I believe he was flattered by her attentions on him.. although at least I had it confirmed what I intuitively felt.. that he doesnt and never did, love her. Which is very important to me and I am very glad he didnt.

Phew! So other than that, I thikn I'm going to have to 'let it go'.. if we get back together we will have to (in true CBT/DB style) just move forwards from this point and largely, draw a line under it, for now. Later, much later, when he is recommitted to me and its 'safe' I am sure we will have some comversations about it and he will want to explain and assuage his guilt over his actions of the past 2 years. But, I can wait.

Hi T ! Nice to see you back, thanks for cheering me on. Not out of the woods yet though ! x