I am as dark as dark can be. I took his mail and dropped it off. I didn't see him. I left him my book The Five Love Languages with the section about cheating marked and a note in the front that said, I understand now and put a p.s. I was wrong. It isn't ever a waste to love someone...Doubt this will do anything. All I can do now is go on. He has forwarded his mail now to his PO BOX. I have no reason to see him and I don't even have his phone number. I'm sure that the hateful words I said will keep him from ever thinking about coming back. The hurt I felt though was immeasurable and I wanted him to hurt as bad as I did. Venom poured forth. I can't take it back. I can apologize, but am I sorry? I have never had someone hurt me like he did. His lies for months on end. My children began to believe that I loved him more than them because he would say he was texting me when he was texting her and they would text me and I wouldn't answer back until the next morning. His making me believe that all of this was my fault. I admit that I did not show him according to his standards that I loved him, but I tried the best way I knew how. *shrugs* I'll move on and life will get better day by day.
"It is excruciating pain. It is the pain of separation, the pain of loss, the pain of dreams and expectations unrealized. It is the loss and death of a mirage."
