I'm having a big ole tag sale this weekend, Friday and Saturday. Do you want to come by ahead of time to get the ratty cage (with assorted paraphernalia thrown in)?
Icky feelings are normal. It's a question of reaction or actions. If I'm reacting to him, I feel horrible. If I am taking action, I feel better.
Everyone only has control of three feet around them. The rest is out of their hands. Keep your feet in the present. You're worth it.
*hugs*
PS.. It doesn't matter if he hangs around to talk to your daughter. Most likely she'll be flitting about. And I do arrive early to performances with book in hand, get a great seat up front and read and relax. Why should I give ex prime real estate in my mind?
I sent this last night to my IC (not scheduled to see her for a few weeks):
Thursday is D10's concert at school. Her friend (gf's D9) is in the chorus, too. X is planning on being there, and I would guess that gf will go along, too.
My stomach is starting to turn...my head says I shouldn't care, but my gut is a different matter. Blech.
It is the first time that I might possibly see them together.
Every time I get to some level of acceptance, something else comes along to cut.
It is so hard to try to be strong...I think I suck at it, actually.
I'm going to call another family from scouts who I know is going (D10's other friend), and see if I can tag along with them / sit with them, something of a distraction. I am trying very hard to not talk to others about this anymore, or let myself fall into a pit of bitterness. I don't want to succumb or fall apart, anymore, especially in front of other people.
When is my life going to be not all-about-this?
Donna, Please don't be too negative with yourself. These situations are very new and uncomfortable, you are not wrong for feeling that.
I love the idea of going with others, I don't care if it's a stranger, don't go and sit alone. My other suggestion is to nip out early and have a pre-arranged meeting spot with D10(or let Dad bring her home). This will avoid the aftermath of hellos and awkward possibilities of running into each other.
Know that planning ahead to manage stress works!
You can do anything...you've already climbed a way too high mountain (and didn't even want to). I'll be thinking of you. IC
So, that is the plan. Think I'll have her dad bring her home, since I will be up front and bringing her, then cheering her on. I'll use the excuse of getting her some flowers for a job well-done. I'll sit with my S and my friend's family, right up front.
S13 has BMX tonight...I didn't email x to remind him. Wonder if he remembered to take him? No emails or calls, so I'm thinking not. But then again, S should have remembered, too.
(My stomach/thoughts are better, btw. Think it helps to have a plan.)
Did I tell you that I named my "inner princess" Celia Grace? Two of the most precocious, smart-mouthed, divas I have in my kindergarten classes this year! They are very smart, obnoxious, bossy, loud, funny, feared, revered, artistic, always-right, beautiful little girls!
Celia told me one day to come look at what she did - she had cut a pattern of holes in her socks in her lap under the table when she finished her work early. Didn't know why I was so upset... Grace convinced all the kids at her table that it was a great idea to draw scribbles ON the brand-new table, like "frames." She had no idea how hard crayon was to get off silestone - but she does now, after 45 minutes and a sponge each for her and her "crew."
Neither of them cried - just met it all with more curiosity.
