Ok, going on day 3 now with no contact other than the job email. Woke up several times last night and was really struggling to put one foot in front of the other this morning. I'm constantly tired and my attitude is really, really poor right now. I think maybe it is over and I'm just having a hard time accepting it. I'm still not going to call and waiting for her to initiate contact. I wonder if she knows, I mean really knows what damage she has done, the hurt she has caused and the family she has destroyed. I pray constantly throughout the day. Sometimes it helps and sometimes my emotions get the best of me. Hope everyone is doing well.
AF--
I know, really know, how hard it is to get out of your own head. But, for your own peace of mind, you HAVE to do it. It is only as over and done as you want it to be. In the meantime, though, you seriously need to find a way to get more rest. Maybe an extra trip to the gym or some outdoor activities with your D in the afternoon? How about planting a garden--veggies or flowers? She will love it, it expends a ton of energy, and you have a real sense of accomplishment when you are done.
I know that your wife will one day regret what she is doing to her D. However, at least she is making an effort, no matter how half-hearted and misguided. My DH has completely abandoned our kids right after returning from a deployment. Read my newest thread to see what the sitch is.
Right now, all you can control is you and you have got to focus on yourself and your D. Do not worry about her. The OM is a bandaid. They eventually get icky and fall off. Do you want to be the same AF when she comes back or do you want to be a better man--not just for her, but more importantly for you and your D?
Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~ SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
