WAW1

[Can it work]

Mark

I know it's easy for you to read a lot in to these gestures like the text messages and the pin cushion but try not to. Your W isn't making a lot of sense right now and her actions may be for completely alien reasons that you're unlikely to understand.

Like JCJ told you in an earlier post, try to remain consistent with your changes. Your W really is noticing regardless of what she says to you. You mentioned before as well that no matter how hard you try to DB/DR or GAL she doesn't notice. You should be GAL for yourself, not for her. The idea is to become a better person in yourself and hope that she comes along for the ride. It's not about becoming a better person for her although I know that in the end you want her to appreciate what you've done. It has to be about you.

I know you're still totally hurting about losing her but you really need to keep your wits about you to have the best chance of reconcilliation. Ignore her messages relating to your R. You can think about things like that at a later date. Don't let her get a response from you that you'll later regret. Every reposnse you do give to her has to be short, to the point, and pleasant. Don't give her anything she doesn't specifically ask for. Don't go telling her about what you're getting up to in life unless she askes first. Even then, keep it brief and polite. If you go out of your way to do something for the kids, don't tell her. Let her notice on her own. If you tell her that you've done something and look for her approval it's like a dog waiting for a pat on the head for being good. You're not her lap-dog. If you do something expecting a reaction from her, that's known as a covert contract in the 'No More Mr Nice Guy' book. These are to be avoided at all costs.

Aside from all that, you seem to be doing better. We all have our off times and mornings do often seem to be the worst. Hang in there and start living DB, not just doing DB. She needs to know your changes are for real and if you aren't consistent and true to yourself, it won't work. Even if you're trying to change, you still have to be yourself. You can't change in to someone you're not because it wouldn't last.

Kev