Oh S, you are so hard on yourself. You are weepy because this all sucks. This is not the way we thought our lives would go. And because we suffer from depression and because we love so deeply.
You let go when you let go. There is no special timeline. It has taken me almost two years. And I am not all the way there yet.
But it really helped me to stop trying to figure out my h and what he has done or said. It is what it is. Knowing why wont change it. Because at the end of the day, our h's dont want to be with us now.
You are really not in a place right now to start any kind of relationship. It would just be adding more on your plate. S, take care of you right now and your children and GD.
Do not worry about h and his relationships with his children. His problem. His loss. Really.
Listen, take care to protect yourself financially. Get yourself settled on your new meds. Start to make the house your home. And limit your contact with your h. Figure out what makes S happy.
